Technology That Old People Need

Larrylambert
4 min readSep 22, 2022

Forget about useless stuff, how about stuff that is actually needed?

Cartoon by Lambert-King

While I’m not very tech savvy, I’m not against all technology. For example, my ability to watch sports or see old movies has been greatly enhanced in recent years. I’m thus able to wile away the remaining days of my life by living in the past. But there are other areas in life that could use a boost from technology. Here are some things that come to mind.

1: An app that lets me know just how much time I can hang on without going to the bathroom.

So, you’re stuck in traffic and you’re not wearing an astronaut diaper, wouldn’t it be nice to know just how long you had before disaster struck? There are all sorts of health apps out there, I would like to see this one come to the market.

2: The “Should I wear this?” app.

Sometimes, as we get older, our ability to judge what looks good on us can falter. For example, I have a good friend who is well up in years. His wardrobe included some shorts that were heavy on the short. It was embarrassing to his daughter. After all, the combination of short shorts and gravity can lead to a dangerous situation.

3: The “Is my toupe/wig on straight?”

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Larrylambert

You probably don't know my name, but have likely seen my work. I've written for numerous syndicated cartoon strips and my gags have appeared in national pubs.