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James Bond Facing Cutbacks

Larrylambert
3 min readJul 12, 2024

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And it won’t be the same.

Cartoon by Lambert-King

These are turbulent times for law enforcement and government agencies here in the United States, as well as in England. Even flamboyant/high-profile agents like James Bond have been affected. It just won’t be the same for 007.

Concerned by the high body count Bond has piled up, MI6 has revoked James’ license to kill. Instead, he’s limited to verbally abusing enemies of the state. While Bond has a license to verbally abuse, even that has its limits. When heaping verbal abuse on his targets, Bond can’t use racial or ethnic terms.

Because of limitations on Bond’s freedom of latitude, Q will be of limited use to Bond. (More on that later.) Since Bond will rely more on verbal than physical abuse, he will be assigned a joke writer. The material produced by said writer will be subject to review by MI6’s newly appointed Sensitivity Board.

In the past, Q has been able to devise tricked-out cars and weapons for Bond. Those days are gone. Instead, Q will be able to offer a Swiss Army knife to Bond. He will also look for the lowest motel rates for Bond when he’s on the road. Who knows, maybe Motel 6 will leave the light on for Bond. Of course, Q will be looking for rewards programs that give the most bang for the buck.

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Larrylambert
Larrylambert

Written by Larrylambert

You probably don't know my name, but have likely seen my work. I've written for numerous syndicated cartoon strips and my gags have appeared in national pubs.

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