Is Chic-fil-A Conspiring with Your Spouse?

3 min readMay 21

How big of a role do you want a fast-food place to play in your life?

Creative Commons: m01229

I like Chic-fil-A. I like their food, they are generally well organized when you go through their drive through, plus, their employees are polite. Those last two points are becoming rarer in today’s world. But I do have a bone to pick with them. A chicken bone if you will. Just how involved in their customers’ lives is Chick-fil-A becoming?

I saw a commercial where a woman says she was never able to surprise her husband, until she enlisted the help of Chic-fil-A. If I’ve followed the commercial correctly, the woman was able to spring a surprise on her husband at Chic-fil-A. It turns out she was pregnant. Think about that.

A guy goes to Chic-fil-A wanting a chicken sandwich and finds out his wife is expecting.

Personally, I think if I was going to be a dad, I’d want to know before the folks at Chic-fil-A. I wonder if the husband would have an aversion to going to Chic-fil-A after that?

An idea for a reality show

While that experience may have gone well for the parties involved what about spinoffs. What if a woman is unmarried and pregnant, and invites her possible baby daddy to Chic-fil-A? When he gets there, he’s ambushed by Maury Povich and a crew that want to get a sample of his DNA?

What if the guy refuses to be tested? Can you imagine that order going in:

‘I need a number four, hold the Q-Tip.

If he’s hesitant would a couple more chicken strips and a large order if waffle fries convince him to take the test?

If he was proven to be the father, would he get a T shirt that said, “Pappa Nugget?”

How many crew members would take to get that t shirt on a reluctant pappa?

When I go out for food, I don’t want surprises.

Generally speaking, going out for fast food shouldn’t be a life changing event. Most of the surprises I get when I go out for fast food is when they get my order wrong. I don’t want anything more traumatic than that.

Plus, I don’t think I want my wife telling a fast-food worker more about our


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