Member-only story
Hidden Problems of Owning the Batmobile
Sure, it’s a chick magnet, but there’s more to consider.
Out of all the superheroes, Batman has the coolest accessory, the Batmobile. Sure it looks great and catches the attention of babes, but there are some downsides to owning a vehicle with that many bells and whistles. They are the types of things the salesman doesn’t talk about on the showroom floor.
First of all, parking that thing is a bear. You really can’t take it shopping. If you take it to the mall you can count on a couple of shopping carts dinging it. And if you try to protect it by taking up two spaces, you can be assured that somebody will be tempted to key it. One of the reasons why Batman is always brooding is he’s worried about the Batmobile.
Plus, you have to have a garage or cave to put the thing in. Sure the Batcave is a neat lair to do research and store crimefighting gadgets, but the primary reason Batman built the Batcave was to store the Batmobile.
In addition, maintenance is a nightmare. You have to special order every part and it takes weeks to get them. The Batmobile is always up on blocks. Plus, who do you get to work on it, Mr. Goodwrench? The local mechanic? It’s hard to imagine a guy leaning over the engine of the Batmobile with his butt sticking out.
